Swampland Thanksgiving Caption Invitational

And so Donald Rumsfeld's White House career begins.

"If we're pardoning white male turkeys maybe there's hope for me."

I am not a cook!

First ever hand shake where President Nixon's hand was warmer.

Don't worry about a thing, I will give you Gerald Ford's number!

"The kids, like all kids, love the turkey and I just want to say this right now, that regardless of what they say about it, we're gonna keep it."

TURKEY: Hey! Hey! I said no pictures!
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NIXON: No pictures? Why not?
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TURKEY: When you resign in disgrace years from now, you think I want my offspring to look at this photo and say, "Dad liked that guy?" No f***in' way!
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NIXON: Enjoy being stuffed. (Turning away, whispering) Call Liddy and have him take care of this for me.

...sadly the next day 3 people in his administation died of salmonella because the president did not wash his hands.

sqr1 wins the thread

I think I'll name you Spiro.

Pssst... Who are all those old white guys with glasses and why are they looking at me like that?

And people tell me I have a fowl mouth!

Shoot, I wanted to double down with the Checkers speech, but Cookie Puss beat me to it.

I'm off to pick up Mrs. Coffee, but I'll do my best:

"Having not seen it on television, Nixon believed he had won the debate."
"We'll put you and Liddy over a flame, and whoever screams first gets killed"
"Checkers did not age well."
"All the President's Hen"
"Mr. Gobblerchop, tear down this wall!" (Makes no sense, but my favorite)

Happy Thanksgiving all.

Turkey: "Never mind, I'm voting for Kennedy."

Happy Thanksgiving folks.

"That reminds me of a joke: Why did the §¶%#^*&@# turkey cross the road?"

Nixon: "Okay lucky turkey, you've been pardoned. Now, everyone step aside so the camera man can get the other turkeys getting their throats slit behind us." ...and with that uplifting visual - HAPPY TG everyone!

"Today, in a historic first, a turkey pardoned the President."

Nixon: "Okay lucky turkey, you've been pardoned. Now, everyone please step aside so the camera man can get the other turkeys getting their throats slit behind us." ...and with that uplifting thought - HAPPY TG everyone!

alt. "Professional courtesy."

We all seem to have the neck puch in common -- do you gobble too?

There's my winner: #18!

"Today, in a historic first, a turkey pardoned the President."

Nice one, sea2008!

"Let me see if I've got this right. You give me the pardon today, and I spend eighteen minutes doing what?"

Y'all are way to clever for me to even try to compete! Happy Thanksgiving!

sqr1 (#3) and see2008 (#18) for a tie!
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Happy TG, KT and all the swamp commenters.